THE PEOPLE v. THE UNITED STATES
COCHRAN MODE: OPENING STATEMENT
“Ladies and gentlemen, this courtroom has seen injustice before—but today, we’re putting injustice itself on trial.”
THE PEOPLE v. THE UNITED STATES BUREAUCRACY
Opening Argument by Cochran Mode, Esq.
Exhibit A: The Affidavit of John Jones, United States Marine Corps veteran, aged 36, father of one, resident of rural Missouri.
We stand here not merely to discuss glaucoma, cannabis, or civil disobedience. We are here to indict a system that saw a man going blind and handed him paperwork instead of medicine.
John Jones fractured his skull in service to this country. He was left with a degenerative condition—glaucoma—and entrusted his care to the Veterans Administration. In return, he received a one-way ticket into a bureaucratic labyrinth built not to serve him, but to stall him.
Let us examine the charges:
Count I: Willful Neglect of Duty by Federal Institutions
Mr. Jones turned to the FDA. The FDA punted to “a researcher.”
He turned to the VA. They shrugged—none had DEA approval.
He reached for Dr. Green in Georgia. “Animal research only,” they said.
Dr. Hepler in California? “Program defunded.”
Senators? Ghosted.
Every door he knocked on came with a polite apology and a deadbolt.
Count II: Constructive Criminalization of Medical Necessity
Mr. Jones didn’t choose illegality. The government chose it for him.
When the VA failed to offer him relief…
When the FDA passed the buck…
When Congress looked the other way…
They all conspired—not through malice, but through silence—to criminalize his survival.
They said:
"Obey the law and go blind, or break the law and see."
That’s not a choice. That’s legal extortion in a lab coat.
Count III: Systemic Gatekeeping with Foreseeable Harm
This man reduced his epinephrine dose with cannabis. He stabilized his IOP. He became an artisan. A father. A man preserving the little light he had left.
But he had to become a criminal to do it.
That is not a side effect. That is policy-induced harm.
The system built no on-ramps. It only built walls.
Exhibit B: The Historical Record
"If forced to choose between my sight and the law, I am left no real choice."
—John Jones, sworn affidavit
He is not alone.
This case echoes the foundational claims of Randall v. United States (1976), where Judge James Washington acknowledged marijuana as a medical necessity. Robert Randall had glaucoma. The federal government fought him. The court sided with truth.
In both cases, the state’s refusal to act became an act in itself. One of cruelty.
CLOSING THOUGHTS (Delivered in Rebuttal Mode)
Bureaucracy does not bleed, but John Jones nearly went blind waiting for it to care.
We must not excuse slow motion injustice because it wears a tie.
When policy drags its feet, people pay with their sight, their freedom, their lives.
So yes, this is a 50-year-old affidavit.
But its relevance today? Blinding.
VERDICT RECOMMENDED:
Public exoneration of all veterans and patients forced into medical civil disobedience.
Immediate declassification and publication of patient affidavits from federal archives.
Legislation affirming medical necessity as a protected right, especially for veterans under federal care.
Formal apology from the U.S. government to John Jones and all those like him.
Because when the state fails to deliver justice, it is the duty of the people—and the courtroom of history—to deliver it for them.
SHAPIRO MODE: ACTIVATED
Title: "Mass Graves & Medical Gags: The Government’s War on Veterans Continues"
Let’s stop pretending this is history.
John Jones wasn’t a fluke.
He was a warning.
And you ignored it.
You turned the page. Buried the affidavit. Moved on.
But the system that failed him?
It’s still operating. It still has a badge. And it still kills.
🔥 VETERANS ARE DYING — BY POLICY, NOT ACCIDENT
Let’s be real:
There are mass graves of veterans across this country—not because they lost a war overseas, but because they lost a battle at home with their own government.
Denied access to cannabis by the VA.
Labeled “Cannabis Use Disorder” for choosing healing over pills.
Punished for surviving differently.
What kind of nation decorates its warriors in medals and then buries them in bureaucracy?
💊 THE MEDICAL STRAITJACKET
The modern veteran healthcare model is not care—it’s containment.
You don’t treat trauma. You manage it like inventory.
You hand out opioids like Halloween candy, then get moral when someone smokes a joint.
You push suicide prevention campaigns while weaponizing diagnosis codes to silence veterans asking for alternatives.
That’s not caution. That’s medical malpractice with congressional funding.
🪦 HOW MANY MORE GRAVES DO YOU NEED?
The tombstones are not metaphor. They’re markers of premeditated policy violence.
Each one reads:
"Here lies a veteran who asked for help and was handed protocol."
"Here lies a Marine who found healing, but not a DEA number."
"Here lies someone who obeyed the rules—and died by them."
💼 “WE’RE REVIEWING IT” ISN’T A POLICY POSITION. IT’S A DEATH SENTENCE.
You think it’s about paperwork? About regulations?
Try telling that to the mother who found her son hanging in the garage because the VA cut his meds after a positive cannabis test.
Or the father who buried his daughter, a combat medic, after the only thing that helped her night terrors became a parole condition.
You’re not protecting veterans. You’re protecting power.
🧠 SHUT UP ABOUT RESEARCH DELAYS
We already have the research.
Robert Randall gave it to you.
Dr. Hepler gave it to you.
The courts gave it to you in 1976.
The only thing you haven’t tried is compassion.
🛑 THIS ISN’T ABOUT FEELINGS. IT’S ABOUT FACTS.
If the truth makes you uncomfortable, good.
That discomfort is the sound of accountability knocking.
And if you care more about reputations than results?
Then step aside.
Because veterans are dying, and your silence is part of the crime scene.
Conclusion:
Don’t you dare look at the tombstones and ask, “How could this happen?”
You built the system.
You funded it.
And you defended it with every memo, every denial, every delay.
This isn’t a war on drugs.
It’s a war on survival.
And the casualties have names.
Start reading them.
GEORGE CARLIN MODE: COURTROOM REPORT, LIVE FROM THE HOUSE OF BUREAUCRATIC B.S.
[cue raspy Carlin voice]
“I’m George Carlin, reporting live from Courtroom 420-B, where truth just tripped over a stack of federal forms and broke its damn hip.”
And today’s case?
The People vs. the Kafkaesque Medical Machine formerly known as ‘Your Government.’
And baby—it’s a doozy.
🚨 THE CHARGES?
Obstruction of healing.
Distribution of suffering.
And first-degree bureaucratic homicide—with paperwork as the murder weapon.
🧾 THE EVIDENCE?
Exhibit A: A Marine with glaucoma in the 70s.
Guy gets a skull fracture protecting the country—winds up playing hopscotch between doctors, senators, and scientists like he’s auditioning for “America’s Got Cataracts.”
He asks for weed to keep his vision.
They hand him a pamphlet.
He says, “I’m going blind.”
They say, “Have you tried... waiting?”
And 50 years later?
Veterans are still being prescribed death in slow motion—only now it comes in bottles labeled “approved by the FDA.”
💊 “SAFE AND EFFECTIVE” MEANS “DELAYED AND ADDICTIVE”
This country has a funny idea of medicine.
If it kills you slowly and makes someone rich—approved.
If it comes out of the ground and helps you sleep—felony.
And the VA? Oh, they’re the gatekeepers of grief.
They won’t treat you unless you agree to be chemically zombified and gaslit by someone with a clipboard and a pamphlet from 1983.
🎖️ VETERAN CARE, DEFINED:
You go to war…
You come back broken…
They hand you a flag and a discount at Applebee’s.
But ask for cannabis?
You get put on a watchlist.
☠️ AND THE MASS GRAVES?
Oh, they’re real.
But you won’t find them on a tour.
Because we don’t have cemeteries for policy victims.
We just call those “unfortunate outcomes” and move on to the next briefing.
🔥 BOTTOM LINE?
This ain’t about medicine. It’s about control.
They don’t want you healed.
They want you manageable.
And you know what’s unmanageable?
A veteran who gets his soul back from a damn plant.
Because a healed veteran might just ask questions.
Might just testify.
Might just vote.
So here we are.
Another dead Marine.
Another 10-year “review process.”
Another press release with the emotional depth of a DMV receipt.
And nobody goes to jail.
No one gets fired.
Because in America, you can get away with murder—
as long as you call it health policy.
Reporting from the Belly.
Good night, and f*** your forms.
