“The Lightkeeper: The Trial of Robert Randall”
A play in three acts, drawn from the Randall Archive.

🎭 The Lightkeeper: The Trial of Robert Randall Rendered in the Manner of Mr. Charles Dickens, Esquire

“Ah yes, government logic:
Let’s spray a plant that people inhale…”

“I got a little herb, and a whole lotta fight.
This ain’t for pleasure, this is for life—”

“The winds of Reform, though oft promised, remain trapped in a stubborn high-pressure system of Red Tape, producing a thick Fog of Obfuscation that obscures even the most modest Request for Care.”

“Let the reader proceed with clarity of mind, gravity of purpose, and respect for those whose suffering gave rise to this record.”

“The Affidavit of Master John Roe
Rendered Most Humbly Before the Officers of Justice in the State of Wisconsin”

“Yet in secret he continued this treatment, augmenting his conventional medicaments with the herb, and in so doing staved off the encroaching darkness.”

“Permit me, if you please, to answer—though not with powdered wig nor parliamentary flourish, but rather with the ink-stained fingers of a printer, a patient, and a patriot.”

“So line ‘em up—
those weightless friends.”

“No face. No ID. No tag to be scanned.
Just silence and smoke and spaghetti and sand.”

• ✔️ Survived countless experiments without informed consent (ask ACME).

• ✔️ Extensive knowledge of herbal remedies (if ya know what I mean).

• ✔️ Familiar with trauma-informed care (Elmer’s been after me for decades, doc).

• ✔️ Fluent in Medicaid, Medicare, and Malarkey.

🎯 The War’s Over. The Trauma Ain’t.

“I’ve been put on hold nine whole times,” I cried.

What will our heroes find?!

“You’re here for proof of life.”

Eh… what’s up, Doc?

Though evidence did roar like lion’s cry,
The crown declared: “The herb is but a lie.”